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THE CAR - 2 Slimes
Rated PG
Copyright 1983 Palo Ato Productions Inc.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Wade - James Brolin! A tough, yet tender, southern California lawman who never wears a helmet when riding his motorcycle.
  • Luke - Alcoholic deputy who managed to stay off the sauce for two years, until this darn car made him drink again.
  • Lauren - Wade's girlfriend, she grabs men by the scrotum as a negotiating tactic. (I'm being literal here.) Tries out for the human speedbump position.
  • Chas - American Indian deputy who manages to reinforce every stereotype in the book.
  • Amos - Nasty old man who beats his wife, ends up saving the town by blowing the car sky high.
  • Everett - He certainly lived a full life before stopping like a deer in those headlights.
  • Margie - Luke's girlfriend or wife, she appears to have torpedoes in her bra.
  • Wade's Daughters - Cute little buttons who wanted Lauren to be their new mommy.
  • The Car - If Satan was going to build a street rod...

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Why the Lord of Evil would choose a small town in southern California (Read into this: desert.) to terrorize with a custom musclecar is beyond me, maybe he just does dumb things at times. The fear campaign proceeds quite well and soon the sprawling town (Population: 40 or so.) is paralyzed, even their amazing police force can't help. Why they needed ten deputies is beyond me anyway, was this place colonized by Hell's Angels or something? Even a tank would have a hard time stopping this car though, at one point it is faced with two patrol cars. Amazingly it turns and begins flipping, rolling over and squashing them before driving off. (The wonders of special effects, or maybe just having two cars and a jumble on the editing room floor.) Everyone struck by the car becomes a fatality, despite the fact that it never runs over them, instead propelling them through the air like some strange tennis ball machine that shoots humans vice tennis balls. Only Wade's ingenious plan saves the day, after luring the car into a canyon they get it to drive off a cliff and then set off dynamite charges, burying the cursed thing under a tomb of rock. There are plenty of scenes with the wheeled antagonist featured, but the movie has some annoying dead sections.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Demonic automobiles see the world through a red filter.
  • It's okay to beat a woman in California, just so long as she is your wife.
  • Falling three hundred feet onto sharp rocks will not blemish a body.
  • It is easy for a car to sneak up on someone in the open desert.
  • Kids and horses can outrun a car.
  • Never call Satan a chickenship son of a bitch.
  • Cars have gas tanks on the roof.
  • Young women would not make good speedbumps.
  • Silver, holy water, the cross, and dynamite shall be your proof against evil.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 6 mins - Why does it have a truck horn?
  • 7 mins - The car just hit the back tire on that kid's bike, he'd have gone under the car and been ground to mush, not bumped over the bridge.
  • 28 mins - What is in the weapons locker? Shotguns and a fire extinguisher of course.
  • 42 mins - True horror: watching a middle school marching band practice.
  • 45 mins - How incredibly stupid of him... ...oh well, he's trampled.
  • 53 mins - If I didn't know better I'd say they filmed the cars doing twenty or so and then sped up the film.
  • 67 mins - Watch how Chas is driving, this must be a really winding road.
  • 70 mins - Why did the highway dead end in her backyard?
  • 93 mins - It's the Rolling Stones and they're on fire!

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

Green Music Note thecar1.wav Deputy: "She said there was no driver in the car."
Green Music Note thecar2.wav Lauren taunting the car.
Green Music Note thecar3.wav Wade: "Looked like he smashed through our cars like he was stomping bugs. I didn't even see a scratch on him."
Green Music Note thecar4.wav Luke: "That car flew into that house four feet off the ground! And how did he know where she lived?"

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 


 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipthecar1.mpg - 2.2m
Watch in horror as the screaming vehicle bears down on unsuspecting children! I think band practice is probably over for today.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 5 6 [7] 8
The Car
Reply #49. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by dreibel
 FUTURAMA did an excellent parody of THE  CAR with their Halloween episode  "The Honking", in which Bender is turned into a werecar. Guess what form he turned into? :) Even better, Bender succumbs to the werecar curse after he's bitten by...a '58 Plymouth Fury......
The Car
Reply #50. Posted on November 21, 2004, 12:48:46 AM by secef (Spell that backwards)
Can satan think of nothing better to do thank run hillbillies down in the middle of nowhere?!?!?!?
The Car
Reply #51. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Bill Newcott
I was fortunate enough to attend the original press screening of The Car at the Academy theater in LA back in '77, and I still remember the truly wonderful cinematography by Gerald Hirschfield, who also shot Young Frankenstein, My Favorite Year, and Diary of a Mad Housewife. Get a hold of Anchor Bay's widescreen video release, and  see how he uses every inch of that image (especially the terrific view from under that bridge). The Car was a good example of how good filmmakers could elevate really derivative material into a minor classic.
The Car
Reply #52. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by kjw
I am really surprised that nobody mentioned the scene where John Rubinstein is run over and run down flat as a pancake by the car while he is out on the road thumbing a ride.What is funny is how the way he reacts to the car,as if some sexy girl is driving behind the wheel,and John acts as if some girl driving the car is going to pick him up.What I think is funny in this scene is when the car picks up speed before it runs him over,and he tells the car to slow down,and then it runs him over.

I also liked the scene after John is killed where John Marley as the sherrif,goes and talks with the guy in the  house,and the guy before Marley questions him,was moments before John is killed is arguing with him.I'm talking about that old man. What was funny was when the old man says to Marley he was run down like a dog,but yet the old man wanted Rubinstein off of his property,and acted like he didn't really give two s**ts about Rubinstein.
The Car
Reply #53. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Calahan
I saw this one yesterday on TV. I can absolutely say that this by far is not a Bad Movie. In fact it's brilliant! And i also believe that the worst b-movie from the seventies era is far far better than many of nowdays blockbusters.

Excellent cinematography. Years after Spielberg's "DUEL" and Friedkin's "EXORCIST" this movie makes a deadly combination.

saw it! loved it! bought it!
(and i live in Greece which makes a little difficult for me to track down cult films in DVD)
The Car
Reply #54. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by coach
son Derek & I sold our actual 58 plymouth CHRISTINE camaro-chaser movie car last November... being that we are still possessed we are having our 97 lincoln limousine fabricated into THE CAR front and back...   we will be driving it to Tulsa next June 17 to see the unearthing of the 57 plymouth belvedere that was entombed 50 years ago in a time capsule...  I have found the 'HORN' ... and we hope to see some of you "THE CAR" fans there... you will know its us when you hear the 'horn' and see the black bad ass limo "CAR" with those bad ass solid wheels...  Darryl Starbird lives near us and he led me to the right folks to have this done...  
The Car
Reply #55. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Dee
My brother always liked this movie. I remember watching it with him once when it was on TV back when we were kids. It was like one of those midnight showings or something. The only thing that really stands out is, if I remember correctly, is the car runs into a house & kills a women. I'd like to see it again, but I think it can be hard to find at most video stores.
The Car
Reply #56. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Zack
I tell you, I can't get enough of that "chilling" car horn/theme song/ battle cry/what-the-hell-ever noise the car made.  and could this movie be concievably more steriotypical concerning native americans and drunks? (some at the same time)
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