|ROCK 'N' ROLL FRANKENSTEIN
|Copyright 1998 R&R Productions
| Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
- King - Franky Stein's monster to be exact, created from parts of famous rock stars! Elvis' head, Sid Vicious' buttocks, Buddy Holly's something (No idea, something though...), Jimmy Hendrix's hands, and Liberace's penis. Well, it was supposed to be Jim Morrison's, but Iggy goofs up. Pulls the gay organ off with a chainfall and dies.
- Franky Stein - Young man who discovered the secret to reviving dead tissue, unfortunately he's a necrophiliac. Gets stabbed with a scapel and dies.
- Bernie Stein - Franky's uncle, a record producer. Quite greedy with a flat head after King squeezes it.
- Iggy - Mind altering substance poster boy, tasked with gathering the pieces for King.
- Mr. Peepers - Weird little thing Franky practiced bringing back to life, it appears to be Satan's pet rabbit.
- Duff, Squeeze, and Mush - The rest of King's band.
- Liberace's Penis - Oh, it has a life of it's own. A gray monstrosity of male genitals, last seen crawling off.
|An entirely whacked out piece of genius that goes a little too far at times, Albert Einstein researching scatology is a good comparision. Bernie is sick and tired of ungrateful singers who constantly leave him in the lurch, so he hires his nephew to create one! Franky discovered the secret to instilling life in dead tissue, mainly so he could have sex with the parts in question. (Ugh, Ugh.) Soon Iggy and his inept, often spaced, pals are digging up pieces of famous rock stars. Everything goes fine until it's time to collect the final part, Jim Morrison's tool, which has been residing in a private collection. In a jar of alcohol may I add, with Lassie's nads nearby - wasn't Lassie a female? During the bungling said named tool is dropped into acid and in a rush to escape (Their bong set off the fire alarm) they grab one at random. Liberace's of all people, needless to say "King" when awakened (He is mostly Elvis, head and brain at least.) is wondering why in the heck gerbils and men's backsides intrigue him so. One thing I never thought a movie would address, that's Elvis arguing with Liberace's penis about dingleberries. Oh boy was I wrong. Plus there's the horror of a gay organ saying it wants to get "shitfaced." Ewwwwwwww... ...I'm okay now, but it took me awhile to stop covering my ears and screaming. Quite honestly the first half of this film is a riot, after that it just goes too far at times. Perhaps, growing up in a small town, I'm a little more sensitive to this. You New Yorkers should be okay for the most part, along with everyone in California. Bible Belt kids - DO NOT SHOW TO PARENTS, bad idea, huge mistake...|
|Things I Learned From This Movie:|| |
- Mad scientists masturbate to autopsy photos.
- Jimmy Hendrix is buried in a dilapidated graveyard.
- People can be welded together.
- Coroners collect body parts.
- Record producers are always fat, balding, and say the "F" word alot.
- Human brain puree' is blue for some reason.
- You can revive someone by electrocuting their testicles.
- Gerbils contain about a quart of blood.
- If your penis starts acting gay, give it a stern talking to.
- Gay men want to have sex with women's kidneys.
- A penis will defend itself if attacked.
- 4 mins - What exactly are you going to do with that cow head? Yikes!, it's mooing!
- 11 mins - More efficient organ?
- 14 mins - No! That jar is labeled "Liberace!"
- 17 mins - Ewwww, a paper sack full of fetuses.
- 26 mins - Little confused about how to use the gerbil?
- 27 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A GERBIL!
- 43 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
- 45 mins - Hey, that's a Commodore 64! It's not on so why was he typing?
- 47 mins - King is talking to his penis and it's arguing back...
- 52 mins - Good grief, a gerbil massacre.
- 60 mins - NASTY sound effects, way nasty.
- 84 mins - King is having a boxing match with his manhood.
| ||Audio clips in wav format||SOUNDS||Starving actors speak out|| |
||Franky: "There's a retired coroner from LA, Dr. Nakasome, and he has the world's largest collection of famous deceased person's private parts, and I know for a fact that Morrison's sex organ is in his collection."
||Dude: "Bad karma, man!" |
Iggy: "Hydrochloric acid!"
Dude: "Oh shit, Pete! You stuck Morrison's ding-dong in a jar of acid!"
Pete: "Bummer, man!"
||King: "You stuck me with a God damned homo wand!"
||The Gay Penis: "Do you know the way to the Hershey Highway? Do you know the way..." |
King: "Oh, you make me sick!"
|Theme Song|| Listen to a clip from the soundtrack. |
| ||Click for a larger image||IMAGES||Scenes from the movie|| |
| ||Watch a scene||VIDEO||MPEG video files|| |
|King argues with his private parts about what their (his and Peter's) sexual preference is going to be. Talk about a one track mind.
| ||Leave a comment||EXTRAS||Buy the movie|| |