|Copyright 1989 Dister Group
| Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
- Wick - Designer of the submarines Siren 1 and Siren 2.
- Nina - Wick's ex wife who is a naval officer.
- Capt Phillips - It's the DI from "Full Metal Jacket!" He plays the Siren 2's Commanding Officer and perishes with it.
- Robbins - Government operative sent to ensure no one from Siren 2 returns alive.
- Sven and Phillippe - Two divers, Sven is eaten by killer seaweed and Phillippe loses his leg to some weird mutant.
- Skeets - Wants Anna bad, he gets chomped by the strange starfish monster.
- Muller and Francisco - Muller is the engine room guy, he gets eaten by seaweed inside the ship (long story) while Francisco, the cook, drinks water contaminated by it.
- Carlo and Flemming - Carlo is the doctor who get's eaten by a mutant eel, Flemming is the sub driver who is bit in the face by a mutant. Anna helps him out by blowing his head off.
- Anna - Fairly pretty girl who is dragged into a DNA accelerator.
- The numerous vicious monsters - There are more than I can count: killer kelp, giant sea slug thing, walking fish lizard, huge tentacle thing, burrow in wall with brains for eyes things, killer eel creature, the starfish from Hell, and kinda humanoid baby thing-a-ma-jigs.
|This movie is pretty amusing for a few reasons, like multiple monsters and gory death scenes. When Anna blows Flemming's head off because he's infected it's pretty gooey. Siren 2 is dispatched on a "rescue mission" for the Siren 1 but it's all a farce, a government experiment with genetic engineering has gone wrong 27,000 feet under the ocean - in a natural air-filled cave at that. With genetic engineering thus presented we are delivered a horde of nasty killer abominations, my favorite is the killer kelp which infects it's victims. Sven encounters the kelp while diving in a dry suit only (any divers out there?) at 20,000 feet! A factoid here: the Guinness book lists the deepest human dive as 900 feet and the deepest submersible dive as 20,000 feet. The poorly designed Siren 2 is able to far exceed that record with a hull crush depth of 35,000 feet. At 27,000 feet they find the naturally air-filled cave where an SOS signal is coming from, investigating the cave thins out the cast nicely as the mutant beasts have a feast. Robbins nearly achieves his goal of destroying the facility and leaving no witnesses but quick thinking on Wick's part saves our heroes. Well, two of them, Capt Phillips stays behind to set off the Siren's self destruct after being infected by the kelp. The scenes are poorly lit at times but there are so many monsters and people getting munched I couldn't help but like this film. |
|Things I Learned From This Movie:|| |
- Nobody wants to share a cabin with the seasick guy.
- Top secret submarines navigate by sight and normally pass within 15 feet of obstacles.
- A human being can dive in a dry suit at 20,000 feet.
- Submarines are equipped with electric "cloaking devices."
- Submarines have legs to "land" on the ocean floor with.
- There are naturally air-filled caverns at 27,000 feet underwater.
- Stay away from perfectly shaped tunnels dug into rock.
- When on a sub don't drink the water.
- Never stroll up to an out of control genetic accelerator.
- 5 mins - Not a naked guy, ugh.
- 9 mins - Bitch! (You'll have to see the scene)
- 26 mins - A human corpse this far underwater and he doens't report it?
- 27 mins - He's being eaten by seaweed! Well, it would help if he didn't pull it around himself.
- 30 mins - Did he just say "Unt?"
- 31 mins - Oh no! You're being attacked by a red dot!
- 40 mins - You're going to drive a sub into a long cave?
- 43 mins - A shipwide PA system but you make everyone meet in the messhall?
- 53 mins - Some weird seaweed all over inside the ship and you have to touch it...
- 64 mins - Anybody else notice the giant starfish thing on the ceiling?
| ||Audio clips in wav format||SOUNDS||Starving actors speak out|| |
||Phillips: "Hayes you can play with your pecker for all I care just as long as you don't do it in my control room. Dismissed!"
||Muller: "Repairs checked unt double checked, like your ordered, sir."
||Wick: "Tell Robbins to reverse the polarity of the ship's radar cloaking device. That should allow the outside electrical field to shock it!"
||Nina: "From the abundant mutants it is obvious that the machine is still producing, God forbid that they reach the surface."
| ||Click for a larger image||IMAGES||Scenes from the movie|| |
| ||Watch a scene||VIDEO||MPEG video files|| |
|Skeets says hello to the starfish from Hell.
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