BADMOVIES.ORG AUDIO PODCAST
" My Neighbor is a Mad Scientist!
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Tedd Miller sent me an email in the early days of 2009, asking what he should do if a mad scientist moved into his neighborhood. Finally, I have an answer for him, and hopefully I'm not too late. Tedd, if you already have tentacles growing out of your cat, it's not too late. If the tentacles are growing out of you, then I'm too late, and please do not hold a grudge against me. I do keep a shotgun and a can of gasoline handy, so if you come knocking on my door I'm going to do to you what I do to all of the other tentacle-waving mutants that show up on my front porch.
"Sooner or later he is going to consider you either a threat, or a potential test subject - both of which are bad."
"He's not a mad scientist. He's just one of those loopy inventors that can't get anything right. The house is going to burn down at the end of this, but you're not going to have to deal with some monster or thing he's made."
"When it comes back, as some sort of killer robot cat machine, it's going to make a beeline for you..."
"What if Muffin wasn't just cut up and brought back to life? What if Muffin was injected with something, or exposed to alien DNA?"
"Egad, I hate parasite-infected rottweilers."
Notes and Links
John Carpenter's The Thing (1982) is the first movie I think of when someone mentions tentacle-covered canine mutant, despite the fact that the "dogs" in that are actually an alien life form masquerading as man's best friend.
Years ago, I sought out an old clothbound book that contained John W. Campbell's Who Goes There? - the novella upon which Carpenter's "The Thing" is based. I actually like Carpenter's twist on the story better than the original.
The briefly mentioned Dr. Pretorius is, of course, a reference to the real protagonist of The Bride of Frankenstein.
The genetically enhanced mastiff in Man's Best Friend proved just how dangerous it is to deliver the mail when a mutant dog is guarding the house.
Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.
Lesson Learned:
Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.