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STRAYS - 2 Slimes
Copyright 1991 MIE
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Lindsey - Possessive of her husband to the point of being irrational, not the one I'd pick in a cat fight.
  • Paul - Our strong male lead, equipped with lightning reflexes and an impressive dog.
  • Tessa - The little daughter, she doesn't do much other than cry.
  • Claire - Lindey's sister and emotional leech, dies after plummeting ten feet. (Even though a table breaks her fall.)
  • Benny - Paul's mop of a dog.
  • Telephone Guy - How an average tomcat killed him we'll never know.
  • The Vet - You think country doctors are old and grumpy? Try some guy who has to stick his arm in cows now and then.
  • The "Alpha" Cat - Leader of a pack of carnivorous kittens. Tries to chew through a power line, just like the shark in "Jaws 2."

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Worries are common enough when buying a home, but I doubt on anyone's checklist is the all important note to inspect the grounds for a pack of deadly felines. Such is the pitfall Paul and Lindsey fall into, though she is more worried about her sister (On the bounce from a failed marriage.) making moves on her man. I am personally not afraid of your standard house cat, but when smashing the thing between a door and the wall only makes it angry - well I'd go and get a bat. Watching a horde of cats staring intently at something off camera, which I suspect was a mouse toy or little tuft of fur on a string, is funny. Now imagine actors trying to get into the role while being stalked by the cameraman, great stuff! One scene really jumps to mind, when the Alpha Cat is trying to scratch it's way through a pillow to get at Lindsey and Tessa. There is obviously someone crouched under the camera and using a pair of sticks with cat paws on the end. (I kid you not, almost fell off the couch laughing.) Perhaps the perfect use for this film is torturing your own cat, just turn up the surround sound and watch it run wild trying to figure out what the heck is going on.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Cats travel in packs.
  • Animal crackers are an invaluable teaching aid.
  • A roof in need of serious repairs will not allow water to ruin ceilings inside the house.
  • Cats can kill a person by jumping on them.
  • Being sprayed with urine will not wake you up.
  • Cats have giant bladders.
  • Cats can claw their way through a wooden door in seconds.
  • Never lie down in a driveway.
  • Felines can only be destroyed by applying high voltage current.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 2 mins - Cat cam!
  • 6 mins - This cat must be eight feet tall!
  • 18 mins - A cat hit the car and knocked it off the road. Huh?
  • 28 mins - The telephone guy found rats in the cellar, but she is setting all the traps in her attic?
  • 29 mins - Now the tow truck driver finds a perfectly good truck, in the middle of the driveway, so he tows it. (After being told to retrieve their car from a ditch.) Plus he turned it around somehow?
  • 44 mins - Paul and Lindsey do not know what "feral" means? One is a lawyer and the other is a writer!
  • 60 mins - Any reason that cat is on the chandelier?
  • 67 mins - Oh sure, the cat fit through that hole in the glass...

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

Green Music Note strays1.wav Paul: "Oh, it does have a certain charm - in an Amityville kind of way."
Green Music Note strays2.wav Killer cat sounds! (Download and drive your kitty insane.)
Green Music Note strays3.wav Lindsey: "Could we at least call a vet?"
Paul: "Lindsey I don't need a vet to teach me how cats behave. I know how they behave; that's why I have a dog."
Green Music Note strays4.wav Paul and the vet talking about deadly cats.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 



 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipstrays1.mpg - 2.0m
Strays killed the telephone man...

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