|Copyright 1979 Paramount Pictures
| Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'
- Rob - Medical doctor called in to investigate claims of pollution. He does not want children.
- Maggie - Talia Shire! (Adrian from all the Rocky movies.) Rob's wife who managed to get pregnant.
- John Hawks - Armand Assante! Indian leader who is fighting to save their land, bear swats him for a home run.
- Ramona - Hawk's wife who rarely talks and usually looks like a scared rabbit. Yet everyone comments on her bravery.
- Mr. Isley - Spokesman for the papermill, eaten by the bear.
- M'Rai - Ramona's grandfather who is senile (due to Mercury poisoning). Tries to pet the pretty bear, becomes chew toy, goes on to a better place.
- Helicopter Pilot - Bear eats his head.
- Campers - Food for bear, one of which is the famous "exploding sleeping bag."
- Kataden - A huge grizzly bear mutated by Mercury poisoning.
|Amazing what one or two improbable death scenes can do for a movie isn't it? I was dead certain this one would get one slime when the "exploding sleeping bag" scene arrived. Knocked it right up to a two.
Rob is a inner city doctor, treating all sorts of ailments in the slums. Here comes a management type, "We need you to go investigate a dispute in the wilderness of Maine, it's between a papermill and the indian tribes." Rob looked at the guy dumbfounded. I looked at the guy dumbfounded. It was in the script so we had no choice; that, my friends, is how you get an inner city doctor into backwoods Maine.
The indians do not want the forest cut down, arguing that the paper mill already damages the environment. The lumberjacks are certain the rash of disappearences have been caused by the Native Americans. What is happening defies logic: a huge mutated grizzly bear is loose! (In Maine - only black bears live there, check Bears.org.)
Tempers are near boiling when our hero arrives. He figures out that something is wrong after seeing a duck eaten by a fish. Finding the partially drowned cubs of Kataden helps convince everyone else. So what does he do with it? Oh, he takes it back to camp... ...terrific idea brainiac. When momma bear comes looking for her offspring a whole bunch of people die. Rob kills the bear by STABBING it with an arrow!
Not many actors in this film deserved their title, especially Maggie. They broke the mold when they made her, to make sure there weren't any more.
|Things I Learned From This Movie:|| |
- Bloodhounds are related to lemmings.
- A scene involving three mutilated corpses and a dead dog does not go well with soothing music.
- Lumberjacks are better at planting forests than God.
- Raccoons stick to boat oars like glue.
- A fetus follows Darwin's Theory of Evolution during development.
- You can hear a woman sobbing above the racket of a serious storm.
- It's always the fat guy who gets hurt and needs to be carried ten miles through the wilderness.
- Bearded men are resistant to crushing.
- 7 mins - Yo! Adrian! (Hehehehe!)
- 16 mins - Why is that helicopter carrying a dog in a sling?
- 24 mins - Chainsaw versus axe fight!
- 37 mins - What terrific acting...
- 44 mins - That is going to be a darn big frog.
- 55 mins - Look at her dummy. Why is your wife acting so funny? Hint: She's pregnant you daft bastard.
- 70 mins - Getting the idea that your wife is knocked up yet? No? Okay, you are a rock...
- 93 mins - Little nipply out here, huh Ramona?
- 98 mins - Why is Rob using pro wrestling moves against this bear?
- Mr. Isley: "People start disappearing, the indians spread the word that they were taken by Kataden. That's one of their legends, they call it Kataden. He he he..."
| ||Audio clips in wav format||SOUNDS||Starving actors speak out|| |
||Hawks: "And which supreme court is that Mr. Isley?" |
Mr Isely: "The Supreme Court of the United States."
Hawks: "Yes we've tried that supreme court, now we're going to one that's higher."
||Mr. Isley: "Go on! Go test the water; we got nothing to hide!"
||Rob: "Freakism! That's what's been going on out there, that's why there's a God damned salmon five feet long and a tadpole the size of what a bullfrog should be!"
||Maggie: "It's not a nightmare that's going to end. It's just beginning because it's inside me."
| ||Click for a larger image||IMAGES||Scenes from the movie|| |
| ||Watch a scene||VIDEO||MPEG video files|| |
|The one single reason you must watch this movie: |
57 mins - The "exploding sleeping bag."
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