RECENT VIEWINGS (Bad Movie Thread!)

[zombie no.one]

haha I get it... I really do.  but something about that movie entrances me from start to end. it just looks so cheap, yet so glossy as the same time (quite a few movies from that timeframe have a similar look?). it's my comfort food movie. also has possibly the greatest theme song of any 80s film (metropolis - darkest side of the night)

ok I'll stop before I end up with 18 paragraphs.

[Trevor]

Zulu Dawn: haven't seen it for a very long time.

[Rev. Powell]

ENTER THE DRAG DRAGON (2023): A kung fu proficient drag-queen detective investigates a missing dog, which leads to a missing treasure, an Aztec mummy, and zombies. Troma-style spoof with ridiculous costumes, fakey gore, groaner jokes, comically bad karate, and nunchuck dildos; essentially inoffensive and fast-paced enough to entertain. 2.5/5

[zombie no.one]

ENTER THE DRAG DRAGON (2023):

bit clumsy...ENTER THE DRAG-ON, surely? 


HELLRAISER: BLOODLINES (1996)

only HELLRAISER I've not seen yet... HELLRAISER in space!! was reliably informed that although it may be bad, at least it's never boring!

at 1 hour mark I was forced to conclude it's bad because it's boring.

HELLRAISER: HELLWORLD (2007) , the cheesiest entry, remains my fav of the series although tbh I'm not a fan of any of them much. watching them has been more an excercise in just ticking off horror franchise boxes. what's in the box?!?!?

[Trevor]

Operation Delta Force (1997): I forgot how unintentionally funny this South African made film is 🥴😆😆😆😆

[Rev. Powell]

STRANGE HOSTEL OF NAKED PLEASURES (1976): Some cultists in negligees conduct a ritual to resurrect Coffin Joe, who immediately starts an inn where gamblers, cheaters, hippies and other reprobates can check in to get naked (and get their comeuppances). Joe takes a lot of reservations and squints a lot, but never tries to sire a child with an immoral superwoman. You're kind of losing your focus here, Joe... 2/5.

[Rev. Powell]

HELLISH FLESH (1977): A wife and her lover plot to kill her scientist husband, but leave him disfigured instead; oddly, he appears to forgive them. Jose Mojica Marins directs a macabre melodrama in a trashy giallo style: despite being made at the dawn of disco, this has a cool, modish Swinging Sixties feel. Fans of eye surgery will be delighted. 2.5/5.

[M.10rda]

]Fans of eye surgery will be delighted. 2.5/5.

 

[M.10rda]

SPACE MUTINY (1988):
Following recent discussion of this, I felt like I should check it out and pitch in my two cents, got less than 15 minutes into the regular version and decided I'd better switch to the MST3K version, then shortly into that version Pearl showed up and I seriously considered switching right back to the vanilla edition.

Anyway, the movie itself: amusing use of "found" footage that they must have licensed or else - how is this movie even available? Hilarious that they just go ahead and call the female lead "Leia" and she even looks like Carrie Fisher w/ a bad bleach job. I did like that brunette Lieutenant from the first third of the film a lot more than I liked Leia - she seemed like a competent actress and Lieutenant. The famous guys all give bad performances though it is funny to watch Cameron Mitchell even try to project gravitas while dressed like Disco Kringle. The action (quote-unquote?) finally yields a little excitement in the last stretch though honestly this would've been torture w/o the riffs.

Okay, the Rev asserted in another thread that Pearl Forrester improved after her first season. That may be objectively true but I'm confident SPACE MUTINY isn't Season 1 Pearl and I still just can't even. When I see Pearl, Bobo, the Overseer, and/or (most often) all three, I suffer a severe physical aversion. When it comes to sketch segments, my team is and will always be Joel, Clay, Frank, and Trace as Crow. After Season 7, the FF button gets a workout during sketches. The riffing is still good though, but the funniest line is in the actual movie, regarding security on the spacecraft. "No one can enter her and no one can leave her." Huh, I used to know a few girls like that.

2/5
I coulda' been a contender! 

[Rev. Powell]

SPACE MUTINY (1988):
I did like that brunette Lieutenant from the first third of the film a lot more than I liked Leia - she seemed like a competent actress and Lieutenant.

Plus, she got brutally killed and went right back to working her desk job!

[Rev. Powell]

HALLUCINATIONS OF A DERANGED MIND (1978): A psychiatrist with a deranged mind suffers the delusion that Coffin Joe wants to take away his fiancee, and hallucinates a clip show of scenes from previous Coffin Joe movies. If all you want is randomly assembled psychedelic scenes of tarantulas crawling over half naked women and faces painted on asses while a man with stovepipe hat and nine-inch fingernails laughs maniacally, with minimal filler, then you'll find this surrealist exploitation at its finest. 3/5.

[Rev. Powell]

EMBODIMENT OF EVIL (2008): Coffin Joe gets out of the insane asylum after a 40-year sentence and immediately goes back to killing and torturing Brazilians, while whining about not finding a woman superior enough bear his child. It has good makeup and a few brilliant moments--like the half-woman birthing tarantulas from her disemboweled torso--but the modern B-movie style doesn't suit Coffin Joe well: some out-of-place CGI, and too much emphasis on torture porn to the exclusion of atmosphere. 2/5.

[M.10rda]

SPACE MUTINY (1988):

Plus, she got brutally killed and went right back to working her desk job!

Now that's professionalism!

DEATH PROMISE (1977):
I followed up SPACE MUTINY w/ the Rifftrax edition of this late 70s kung fu film that I thought was a different late 70s kung fu film w/ zombies and the devil. (I still can't recall what the heck movie I was thinking of but this one has no zombies or the devil.) DEATH EXPRESS has a diverse cast of guys in goofy 70s hairstyles (including a black guy who starts the movie w/ a cool fro but ends the movie in a lame cross between cornrows and a jheri curl) fighting to save a single rundown tenement building and avenge some murdered family members. This single rundown tenement building is the focus of a vast conspiracy run by five wealthy NYC businessmen/politicians who seem like they should have bigger fish to fry, as well as (per the final plot twist) at least one international criminal syndicate that absolutely has better things to worry about than a rent strike in NYC. That final plot twist does a MONSTER-A-GO-GO / OCEANS TWELVE-style job on the logic of one of the main storylines, as well.

DEATH PROMISE is a pretty bad movie but I enjoyed it more than I enjoy many better-produced Asian martial arts films of the same era, because by the late 70s the Shaws et al had the formula down to a science and thus, while competent, I find most late 70s/early 80s Chinese kung fu movies to be quite dull. Cheap American imitations like DEATH PROMISE are relatively inept but everyone onstage (non-Asian guys and Asian Americans alike) are all so enthusiastic about kicking each other that they manage to transcend their modest abilities through sheer pluck, like Mickey and Judy in those old "Let's put on a show, kids!" flicks. You're also more likely to get some twisted embellishments in these cheapo American joints, like a bad guy who gets a sack of rats tied to his head. It's scarcely a believable effect but it sure is funny.

2.5/5
The riffs are good too.

[Trevor]

SPACE MUTINY (1988):
Following recent discussion of this, I felt like I should check it out and pitch in my two cents, got less than 15 minutes into the regular version and decided I'd better switch to the MST3K version, then shortly into that version Pearl showed up and I seriously considered switching right back to the vanilla edition.

Anyway, the movie itself: amusing use of "found" footage that they must have licensed or else - how is this movie even available? Hilarious that they just go ahead and call the female lead "Leia" and she even looks like Carrie Fisher w/ a bad bleach job. I did like that brunette Lieutenant from the first third of the film a lot more than I liked Leia - she seemed like a competent actress and Lieutenant. The famous guys all give bad performances though it is funny to watch Cameron Mitchell even try to project gravitas while dressed like Disco Kringle. The action (quote-unquote?) finally yields a little excitement in the last stretch though honestly this would've been torture w/o the riffs.

Okay, the Rev asserted in another thread that Pearl Forrester improved after her first season. That may be objectively true but I'm confident SPACE MUTINY isn't Season 1 Pearl and I still just can't even. When I see Pearl, Bobo, the Overseer, and/or (most often) all three, I suffer a severe physical aversion. When it comes to sketch segments, my team is and will always be Joel, Clay, Frank, and Trace as Crow. After Season 7, the FF button gets a workout during sketches. The riffing is still good though, but the funniest line is in the actual movie, regarding security on the spacecraft. "No one can enter her and no one can leave her." Huh, I used to know a few girls like that.

2/5
I coulda' been a contender! 

I know most of the crew involved in this thing: the cinematographer was a mentor of mine 😳😉🐢

[RipleyJSmith]

I recently rewatched the Poison Ivy film series and I'm probably gonna get a lot of flack for this, but I'd say Poison Ivy 3 is my favorite of the original three flicks.

While it is the sleaziest, it's also the most consistent in tone and knows what it is and what it's trying to be.